My wife and stepdaughter went to the garage to rearrange things in preparation for the "gar(b)age sale."
I was in the house when my wife had this "look" on her face. A face of fear.
She went on to tell me that when she opened up the main door to the garage, she saw something fall down in the corner. Jingles the Wonderdog went in to investigate and started barking. My wife went to the scene of the commotion and noticed a rattlesnake slithering around in the corner and then disappeared.
I went down to the greenhouse and grabbed the drain spade and walked over to the garage door area. JayMi was holding Jingles who was squirming and whining in her arms. I told her to put the dog in the enclosed garden area until I found the snake. As soon as she did that and walked away, Jingles started whining and barking more. My wife told JayMi to stay close to Jingles.
I got on my hands and knees hoping to spot the elusive rattler. I moved the air compressor out of the way to get to the other "stuff" that amassed in that corner where the snake was.
My wife said, "Maybe he is under the generator."
I reached down to grab the handle of the generator and pulled it back towards me.
Lo and behold, there it was all coiled up. Hissing and rattling. Approximately 18 inches in length. Western diamondback.
The first poke with the spade resulted in hitting its body. Now, it is really pissed. The next strike with the spade point resulted in decapitation. Body still moving and the head still flicking the tongue.
It was a meaty rattler. "Hey, let's say we gut it, boil it and de-bone it. Sautee some garlic with some extra virgin olive oil in a wok with some Chinese snow peas, bean sprouts, shredded carrots and some organic Asian noodles?"
My recipe suggestion was overturned by a majority of two squeamish faces.
"Throw it in the garbage can!"
"No, it will stink by the time the garbage man comes on Friday. I will throw the body down the hill."
"Throw the head away in the garbage?"
"Yeah, that's okay."
My wife grabs a spade to pick up the severed head. As I made my way towards the hill, I hear this scream.
Turns out the severed head flipped over in the spade and startling my wife and JayMi.
How that snake "fell" is anyone's guess. It had to be warming itself up with the heat reflecting off the garage door and concrete. Upon investigating, at the bottom of the garage door and the jamb, there is this small space large enough for a small animal to make its way into the gargage. Guess it got caught somehow when the garage door was opened. Who knows.
Everyone is safe and Jingles got a reward of bacon treats. Maybe I should have let him eat the snake. Jingles the Rattlesnake Killer! Probably a mongoose in his previous life.
One less rattler in the world. Where there is one, there will be others. It is that time of year again.
We will just have to be extra careful when we are outside.
