NEW CAMERA

Oh...

Did I forget to mention I got a new Canon digital SLR camera for my birthday from my mother.

Nice...

5IVE 1NE

Yes, I'm bein' followed by a moon shadow moon shadow moon shadow.
Leapin' and hoppin' on a moon shadow moon shadow moon shadow.
And if I ever lose my hands,
Lose my plow, lose my land -
Oh, if I ever lose my hands
Ooh
I won't have to work no more.

And if I ever lose my eyes
If my colors all run dry
Yes, if I ever lose my eyes
Ooh
I won't have to cry no more.

Yes
I'm bein' followed by a moon shadow moon shadow moon shadow.
Leapin' and hoppin' on a moon shadow moon shadow moon shadow.

And if I ever lose my legs
I won't moan and I won't beg
Oh, if I ever lose my legs
Ooh
I won't have to walk no more.

And if I ever lose my mouth
All my teeth north and south
Yes, if I ever lose my mouth
Ooh
I won't have to talk no more.

Did it take long to find me? I asked the faithful light.
Did it take long to find me and are you gonna stay the night?

I'm bein' followed by a moon shadow moon shadow moon shadow.

Leapin' and hoppin' on a moon shadow moon shadow moon shadow.

Moon shadow moon shadow moon shadow moon shadow.

by Cat Stevens

Today, is the day. Another one in the record books.

Now, today is also very special in another way with many "firsts":

I never had a breakfast burrito from Whole Foods in Fresno on Palm and Shaw on my birthday.
I never had a good hot cup of coffee from Whole Foods on my birthday.
I never saw the sunrise on my birthday while driving to work in Fresno on my birthday.
I never carpooled with my wife on my birthday.
I never had a cup of Starbucks coffee on my birthday.
I never went to REI on my birthday (go figure!)
It never rained on my birthday.
I never got sick on my birthday.

Until now...

Especially the sick part. Got it from my mother-in-law. Got the sniffles on Monday. My nose runs better than I do. At work, nonstop. Every five minutes I grab a tissue.

So far, no one else in the family has gotten it from me that I know of.

Life goes on.

Oh, well...

If I ever lose my nose
Not my hands, eyes, mouth, legs (plus toes)
Yes, if I ever lose my nose.
Ooh.
I won't have to sneeze sniffle wheeze no more.

Yes, I'm bein' followed by a moon shadow...
Moon shadow.
Moon shadow.

A FUNNY THING HAPPENED AT THE WOOD PILE

A funny thing happened at the wood pile...

This morning, I went to the wood pile to get some kindling to start the woodburning stove. As I was moving stuff around to get to the kindling and putting it in the paper bag, I noticed out of the corner of my right eye a deer...a young buck...coming towards me from the front of the RV shed.

"Hey, there!"

At first I thought, it was just curious and eventually would go away, but it didn't. It kept coming closer and closer. It stopped to rub its nose on the wheelbarrow handles and then proceeded to get closer. It pushed its head into my left side then down to my feet. It then started to rear up on its hind legs.

Whoa, wait a minute big fella, you ain't going to try it!

I turned towards the wood pile with the bag of kindling in my right hand. Now, there is nothing but kindling in that wood and I am not wearing any type of musk cologne. It still kept nudging me.

I thought to myself where is a camera where you need one? No one is going to believe me what is happening out here. I look around to see if anyone is watching. No one.

I decided to head back to the house. At first I contemplated heading into the confines of our backyard, but thought best not to (more on this later).

I thought for sure the deer would not follow me, but sure enough it did as we made our way slowly towards the house.

I walked outside the fence line. I look towards the house as I make it by the den, the laundry room and then the kitchen windows. No one to be seen. Where in the hell is everybody?

The deer is still following me. This is good. Now, where in the hell is ANYBODY?

I see someone in the laundry room looking into the refrigerator. I wave my arms hoping that whoever was in that room could see me and not startle the deer in the process. To no avail. Damnit! Where in the heck is ANYBODY?

In the meantime I am waiting for anyone to appear in the kitchen and look out the kitchen window. NO ONE! I look towards the living room window. NO ONE! Will someone please see me.

The deer goes around behind me and finds a clump of pumpkin seeds from a pumpkin we had gutted to make soup a couple of nights ago. The deer commenced to eat the seeds and pumpkin guts. Good boy. Keep eating. MAYBE SOMEONE WILL SEE US!

Then my wife comes out of the den area and walks towards the garage. Why are you looking over there? I AM OVER HERE!

She looks in my direction but fails to see me! I call her name and wave at her to get her attention and point to her what was happening. She didn't notice at first and had that perplexed "What-the-hell-are-you-doing-out-there-and-where-is-the-kindling-I-asked-you-to-get" look. Then the expression of amazement overcame her when she noticed the deer by my side. She mouths, "Oh, my god!" then asks me, "Where is the camera?"

"It is in our bedroom on the dresser."

She goes back into the house. Where is my mom? I know Pam's parents are still in their room asleep. Pam comes out of the den area with camera in hand. She starts to take pictures.

"Where's my mom?"

"I can't find her."

"Go get her, please."

As soon as Pam enters the house, the deer rears back on its hind legs. He wants to play. I back away slowly as to not make the animal charge or startle it. I pet its head to comfort it. Petting a wild animal in OUR BACKYARD! Now, that is definitely a first!

Now, where me and the deer are standing, there is a sharp dropoff about 75 feet down. Not much room for error. So I stand real close to the fence. If it charges or tries to flip me, I can hold on and then try to vault over the fence line.

Pam comes back out of the laundry room area and says she found my mom. Just then Jingles the Wonderdog comes outside just awakening from his slumber.

Oh no, this is not good.

I said to myself, "When he sees the deer..."

Pam gets ready to take more pictures...

In the milliseconds that followed after my thoughts and with Pam getting ready to snap some more pictures, Jingles sees the deer and starts barking. The startled deer dashes along the fence line towards the garage. Jingles wriggles through the iron slats and continues his chase of the deer. Way to go, Jingles.

We yell, "Jingles, COME HERE!" Forget it. The deer and the dog run out of sight.

Then, my mom comes outside!

"Where were you?"

"I was changing my clothes."

Oh well, at least there are three pictures.

The deer eating.

Where is my mother?

Does anyone else see me out here?

COMING TO AMERICA

Mom arrived today for a visit. She flew in from Narita, to San Francisco, and then to Fresno.

It is nice to see her again.

WHATEVER...

To the trespasser: Made your asshole pucker, didn't I? Nothing like the distinct sound of a 12-gauge Mossberg pistol grip shot gun with the muzzle pointed in your direction. Don't come back now, hear?







To the gas companies: Gas was $4.099 on July 31 at the 22-Mile Valero Station between Coarsegold and Fresno on Highway 41. Last night, it was down to $1.989! How low will it go before OPEC shuts down everything? Anyhow, thank you in the meantime.

To the Somali pirates: Don't even think of it!























To Lance Armstrong: If you are worried about your safety during your Tour de France ride in 2009, stay retired! Let go the ego!

To Donovan McNabb, Philadelphia Eagles quarterback: Yes, not only are their ties to wear around your neck, but their are ties in the NFL. Where have you been?

To Hillary Clinton: Line of succession to the presidency is Vice-President, then Speaker of the House, then Senate Pro Tempore, then Secretary of State. GO FOR IT!

To the stock market: Plunge. Who cares? Our retirement portfolios are going down with you, too.

To Ayman al-Zawahri, al-Qaida #2: You're next. We got your jihad right here!

To the Big 3 automakers: Make better cars while you still can. We see more Hyundais and Kias. Guess we will be seeing more on the road now.















To Congress: Bail out the workers who will be losing their jobs at the Big 3!

SAMSON, THE HOCKEY CAT

Samson has grown considerably since we got him. He is now just as big as Jingles. Jingles is a little jealous of all the attention we give Samson.

I have been feeding Samson the wet cat food every night. I buy the big can but divide the can into 8 sections. I feed him only one section per night. As soon as I open the door he is right there waiting. As for Jingles, he wonders where his "wet" food is. Papou and Nana do not feed him nothing but the dry stuff, so I offer Jingles some Buddy Biscuits from Trader Joe's and he seems content with that.

Now, Samson has seem to taken up indoor hockey. The doorstop we use to prop the hallway door open is now his "puck." He is constantly slamming the puck into the walls and crashing into the walls to retrieve it. This is at 5:00 in the morning. Who needs an alarm clock?

Sometimes he runs all the way from the den, down the hallway, into the dining room doing 360's on all fours. Quite the comic cat he is. He is also bodychecking me as I make my way around the house by cutting me off at the legs. He sometimes gets kicked by accident but he seems to enjoy it. Pain cat.

He is my constant companion as I make my way out to retrieve the paper every morning. He opens the door for me with his front paws (I leave the door slightly ajar when leaving the house.)

He is the only cat I know that can double his body weight as you try to pick him up from the floor to take him outside. Plop down boy.

He is now big enough to jump from the floor onto the kitchen counter. Bad cat.

BROWN SIDE "OUT"

The recent rains having come and gone and left their mark...the hills are turning green again.

Some of the local lower elevation mountains are now void of snow. However from Fresno, you can see some of the snow-capped peaks of the Sierra Nevada peaking over the lower hills.

Hopefully more storms will come our way during the year of "La Nada"...

That also means in about 4-5 months it is time to get the weed whacker and mower out. Ah, exercise in the spring!

To all of our friends down in Southern California...we hope you are out of harm's way during the recent fires.

LAUGH

LAWYER JOKES

These are for you, TeamBruin!!!

Unreasonable Bill

A client, who felt his legal bill was too high, asked his lawyer to itemize costs.

The statement included this item:

"Was walking down the street and saw you on the other side. Walked to the corner to cross at the light, crossed the street and walked quickly to catch up with you. Got close and saw it wasn't you. -$50.00."


Need a new lawyer?

Warning Signs that you Might Need a Different Lawyer

1. Your lawyer tells you that his last good case was of Budweiser.
2. When the prosecutors see your lawyer, they high-five each other.
3. Your lawyer picks the jury by playing "duck-duck-goose."
4. Your lawyer tells you that he has never told a lie.

CONQUEST OF EL CAPITAN

By Marek Warszawski / The Fresno Bee























Warren Harding, Wayne Merry and George Whitmore, left to right, wave their handkerchiefs in elation in 1958 after scaling what until then had been the unclimbed face of El Capitan. The picture was taken by Fresno Bee staff photographer Loyal Savaria within a few minutes after they walked up to the summit. About three hours before the climbers edged up over the rim of the sheer face, they ate breakfast before going on up to the top.


Much like it dominates the entrance to Yosemite Valley, El Capitan dominates Yosemite rock climbing. Climbers prefer the shortened version, El Cap, or its most common nickname, "The Captain." Three thousand feet of sheer, vertical granite that's as accessible as it is beautiful to look at.

While El Capitan has witnessed many astonishing climbs over the decades, none are more celebrated than the first ascent, a gargantuan effort finally completed in November 1958 by Warren Harding, Wayne Merry and George Whitmore.

The route that Harding, the party leader and one of Yosemite's legendary figures, had chosen and literally nailed his way up would become known as the Nose.
Fifty years later, the Nose remains the most popular route out of dozens on El Capitan. Each year hundreds of climbers, many of them from far-away countries, travel to Yosemite to tackle iconic features such as Stoveleg Crack, King Swing and the Great Roof.

"Every rock climber in the world knows the Nose of El Capitan," said Steve Roper, author of several books on the subject. "It's what they aspire to."

This weekend a large group of them, including some of the early pioneers, are commemorating the 50th anniversary of El Capitan's first ascent with two days of storytelling and slide-shows. Most events are open to the public.

Among the honorees are Fresno natives and lifelong residents Whitmore and Rich Calderwood, a team member who didn't reach the summit.

"We realized what we were doing was out of the ordinary and special, but it's safe to say we didn't realize how special it would be," said the 77-year old Whitmore, standing in the leafy front yard of his Fresno home. "To this day, my life is influenced by that climb."

Harding, who died in 2002, surely will be the gathering's biggest absence. Without this visionary, remembered both as "a brave and tenacious man" and "a sports car-driving, hard-living hedonist" by two who climbed with him, history wouldn't be the same.

When rock climbers first started poking around Yosemite Valley in the 1930s, El Capitan couldn't have been further from their minds. It was simply unfathomable. But standards (and boldness) improved rapidly, and by the mid-'50s every major formation had been scaled except El Capitan and Half Dome.

Half Dome, about two-thirds the height of El Capitan and less sheer, fell to a party led by Royal Robbins in June 1957. One prize remained, and Harding wanted it more than anything.

According to Roper's 1994 book, "Camp 4," Harding spent an entire day peering at El Capitan through binoculars trying to find a way up. El Cap has two major faces, southwest and southeast, and the route he chose followed the subtle prow on the buttress that connects them. This prow, or nose, is obvious only from the side.

"Warren always liked the boldest looking lines," said Ken Yager, president of the Yosemite Climbing Association. "But I think the main reason he chose it was it had an obvious ledge system that was nicely spaced out for storing provisions."

Harding and his rotating band of partners (eight men would pitch in at various intervals) needed plenty of provisions. While mountaineers in the Alps and Himalayas had climbed higher peaks under worse conditions, never before had anyone attempted a wall of this height and steepness.

A climb this huge required "siege tactics" that were unheard of in Yosemite. Instead of trying to complete the route in one continuous push, a notion that was deemed impossible, the climb was done incrementally. The party would spend all day reaching a certain high point, set fixed lines, rappel down and later use the fixed lines to regain their high point.

When Harding, Mark Powell and Bill "Dolt" Feuerer left the ground July 4, 1957, no one could have predicted it would take more than 16 months to reach the summit. Only 47 days were actually spent on the wall.

There are several reasons why the climb seemingly dragged on forever. For one, almost all the work got done on weekends because Harding and his crew either held regular jobs or were full-time students.

The climbing methods were radically different as well.

Unlike today's "free" climbers, who use rope and hardware only to protect themselves from falls, those in Harding's day practiced "aide" techniques. That is, they drove steel pitons into cracks in the wall and used them to gain elevation. To overcome blank walls where no cracks existed, they hammered expansion bolts.

"It's more like rock engineering than actual climbing," Roper said.

El Capitan also presented a unique set of challenges. To overcome a 300-foot series of 3-inch wide, nearly vertical slits in the rock, Harding utilized several custom wide-angle pitons that two friends, Frank Tarver and Calderwood, forged for him from the enameled legs of old-fashioned stoves.

The so-called stoveleg pitons have since entered into Yosemite legend.
























Besides the 3,000-foot cliff itself, the other major obstacle was the Park Service. Tourists flocked to the base of El Capitan to watch the climbers progress, causing traffic jams on Yosemite's major artery. After a meeting with the chief ranger, Harding agreed to postpone the effort until after Labor Day.

By the end of November 1957, Harding and crew had climbed 1,200 feet to a sizable ledge named Dolt Tower. Winter arrived, and the fixed ropes were left dangling from the face till the following spring.

The climb resumed in March 1958, but progress was slow and deliberate. And for good reason: If anything went wrong up there, there was no hope of a rescue. After the Park Service imposed another summertime ban during the height of tourist season, rangers gave Harding a Thanksgiving deadline.

"I never understood how this was to be enforced," he later wrote.

By Nov. 1, 1958, fixed ropes reached to a ledge named Camp IV nearly 1,900 feet above terra firma. It was then that the group, which by this time consisted of Harding, Merry, Whitmore and Calderwood, decided to make a final push for the top.

"I remember Warren saying he was getting sick and tired of going up those goddamned ropes," said Whitmore, who joined up after spending two months climbing in Peru. "He said, 'Let's finish this climb, or let it finish us.' "

Harding decided to divide the duties. While he and Merry would be in the lead pushing the route, Whitmore and Calderwood were assigned the sherpa-like tasks of hauling loads and managing ropes.

To ascend fixed ropes in those days, climbers used a technique called prusiking that involved the use of three hitch knots, one affixed to a chest loop and the others to foot slings. Each knot could be slid up the fixed rope and tightened when body weight was applied, allowing for slow, incremental progress.

Making things more difficult, Whitmore and Calderwood had to prusik while toting 40-pound duffle bags that dangled below their feet from loops tied around their waists.

"It would take us half a day to reach the previous day's high point, by which time we'd be exhausted," Whitmore said.

Eight days in, Calderwood decided that he'd had enough and rappelled all the way to the ground without telling anyone he was quitting. Harding, Merry and Whitmore were left to wonder if he had fallen. (Earlier in the climb, an unroped Calderwood nearly plunged to his death from Dolt Tower.)

While Harding later wrote that Calderwood quit the climb because of "a bad case of nerves," the 71-year-old Calderwood offers a differing version, noting he was a Fresno State student with a pregnant wife who also worked full time at his dad's print shop.

"My father had instilled in me a puritan work ethic," he said. "I remember thinking, 'I've got to get back to work, I've got to get back to school and I don't have to do this.'"

The three-man team pushed on and by late afternoon Nov. 11, Harding and Merry stood on a tiny ledge only 120 feet below the top. At dusk, Whitmore joined them with a fresh supply of bolts, setting the stage for the most famous night in Yosemite climbing history.

Faced with a blank, overhanging wall above him, an exhausted Harding worked through the night, pounding 28 bolts into the rock before finally pulling himself onto the summit slabs shortly after dawn on Nov. 12, 1958.

"I didn't sleep much either," said Whitmore, who spent the night in slings impaled on a sharp point. "I remember hearing the 'tap, tap, tap' of Warren's hammer all night long."

News of the successful climb spread like wildfire thanks largely to Harding, who wasn't exactly averse to publicity (a trait that didn't endear him to other climbers of his era). Stories and photos of the first ascent team appeared in newspapers throughout the country.

Though he will always be remembered as the man who "conquered" El Capitan, Harding had a different take in his memoir, "Downward Bound."

"It was not at all clear to me who had conquered and who was conquered," he wrote in 1975. "I do recall that El Cap seemed to be in much better condition than I was."

























Of the dozens of routes rock climbers have used to scale the 3,000-foot sheer face of El Capitan, none are more famous (or more often repeated) than the Nose, indicated by the red line. Fifty years ago, Warren Harding, Wayne Merry and George Whitmore of Fresno pioneered this route during their historic first ascent in November 1958. The climb took 16 months, but only 47 days were spent on the wall.


FIRST ASCENT OF THE NOSE: 50TH ANNIVERSARY CELEBRATION

When: Saturday and Sunday

Where: Yosemite National Park

Schedule: Saturday, informal gathering at the East Auditorium (1-4 p.m.), slideshow (7:30 p.m.); Sunday, lunch at the Ahwahnee Hotel (noon)

Details: yosemiteclimbing.org

Notable Nose climbs

First ascent: November 1958 by Warren Harding, Wayne Merry and George Whitmore in 47 days over 16 months

Second ascent: September 1960 by Royal Robbins, Chuck Pratt, Tom Frost and Joe Fitschen in 71/2 days

First one-day ascent: June 1975 by Jim Bridwell, John Long and Billy Westbay in 17 hours, 40 minutes

First all-female ascent: 1977 by Molly Higgins and Barb Eastman

Youngest climber ascent: 1992 by 11-year-old Scott Cory

First free ascent: 1993 by Lynn Hill

Fastest ascent: Oct. 12, 2008 by Hans Florine and Yuji Hirayama in 2 hours, 37 minutes, 5 seconds

SHELTERS

The heavy equipment arrives today for the construction of two underground shelters. One at our place and another one at my brother-in-law's. There is a third shelter in the works near Oakhurst.

We are using old freight shipping containers. Some need reinforcing before they are covered with dirt.

The inventory (ever growing):

Rifles with scopes
Pistols
CCW permit
Ammunition
Bows
Crossbows
Arrows
Machetes
Knives
Axes
Shovels
Canned goods
Cooking oil
Seeds
Dehydrated foods
First aid kits
Compass
Rope
Clothing
Boots
Cold weather gear
Gas mask (two Israeli M-15)
Camping gear
Cots
Blankets
Pillows
Water filtration systems
Bleach
Engineer stakes
Barbed wire
Batteries
Fire starters
Firewood
Binoculars
Solar collectors
Generator

NO DRIZZLE FIZZLE

El Nino, La Nina, La Nada...

Meteorologists can't bet one way or the other this year because there is no warm-water El Niño or cold-water La Niña in the Pacific Ocean. El Niño can mean more rain; La Niña can mean less.

This year, the ocean is La Nada -- the unofficial term that means the ocean's water temperature is normal, offering no clues for forecasters and little encouragement for farmers or reservoir operators.

There is one climate hint called the Madden/Julian Oscillation -- a powerful tropical wave of wind that circles the globe in 30 to 60 days. The wave is occurring right now and helped bring the first significant rain and snow to the state this weekend.

La Nada? The weekend storm dumped more than 1.5 inches at our basecamp at 1,500 feet.

Saturday was just a precursor of things to come. There were pockets of intermittent downpours all throughout the morning. As Pam and her mom were preparing dinner for my brother-in-law's 49th birthday, I was outside clearing out the lava rocks in preparation of making that part of the yard a Zen garden. The rain seemed to have stop. So much of the expectation of getting some desperately needed rain.

Late Saturday night there was steady activity of precipitation. Maybe, just maybe this is it...the first major storm to hit since the lightning strikes in June.

Sunday morning was a deluge. We were going to go running in the light rain, but just as we got dressed ready to run, the rain came down hard. Poor Sampson, who was outside under the back patio, was crying to be let in due to the noise of the rain coming down on the roof. He wasn't a very happy kitty.

Late Sunday afternoon, the sun broke through and off in the distance in the surrounding peaks near Bass Lake, the snow is visible.

The snowshoes are out.